Weigh-In #1: What I have gained

Well, I gained one pound for my first week of blogging through my weight loss. I am totally OK with it though. I am honestly relieved I didn't gain more. I know exactly what I did wrong. I'm working on changing it, and hopefully a week from today I will lose that pound (and more!).

Today I kept thinking about the goals of mine and this thing in my mind of having a goal outfit or something. I mean I seriously have bins of clothes that I would love to fit into someday. I have goal outfits - lots of them. But in early May my husband and I are going to go out to dinner for our anniversary. We don't go out to dinner much at all. We don't go out with our girls because it's too hectic. The last time we went out for dinner (just the two of us) was for my 30th birthday and I will be 33 in April - so I think we're due. I am really excited about this! I am hoping my hubby will be up for getting "dressed up" at least a little - he doesn't have to wear a suit, but a nice dress shirt would be good. I  am going to go through my closet and pick out one of my dresses that I would like wear on that date.  I am going to hang it up in a good spot so I can see it every day - that kinda stuff motivates me. I have (slightly more than) three months to get into something.

Last night I mentioned the whole wedding dress thing to my husband and he disagreed with me - he thinks our oldest would be shocked to see me in my dress. I'm going to try for it. Either she will think I look like a princess or she will have no reaction - but I want to see which one it is, and you know what, I will!! 

I have followers! Two of them!

Hello to my two followers. Thank you for reading my blog. I really hope you can inspire me because lately I am just stuck. This weekend was filled with lots of hard work but no working out. I had intended to walk on the treadmill again this weekend and I didn't do it. I did clean the whole house on Saturday though, does that count? I also listed a ton of stuff on Ebay in our store - but that was basically me sitting on my butt.

Quite a few times this weekend my body ached. I know it's the weight. I get it. Lose the weight, you'll feel better, you'll look better, you'll have better self esteem, you'll fit into all that clothes you own (all that cute stuff!), you'll be healthier. Should I keep going?! Nah.... I know this stuff. I feel it all the time. I feel it every single time I over-eat or I run around with my kids and I get out of breath, or I tell my four year old that I can't pick her up and dance with her because she is too heavy for me. Well, if I lost all this damn weight I could carry her around.

I just don't know why I can't do this. Maybe it's because I went for a physical in December and all my blood tests came back OK. When the nurse called with my results she said, and I quote, "the doctor said to keep doing what you're doing, you're doing great!". Ummm... really? I'm obese! How is that great? I did tell the doctor that I was doing Weight Watchers (because I was at the time), and she said that was "great". So maybe that is what the nurse meant when she said to keep doing the same thing - "keep losing the weight, dummy, don't GAIN it!.

I can't keep coming up with excuses. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels. It's true! I've been there. I was a size 12 and I loved it! Heck, I would settle for being a size 14 now. I figure after having two kids a size 14 would be something to be proud of. I want to have a neck. I want to have one chin. I want to not look like I am pregnant. I want to be pretty. Confession, I want to fit into my wedding dress again. Not because I will wear it anywhere (maybe grocery shopping like that chick in the Progresso Soup commercial - ha!), but I want to put it on and zip.it.up. I want to show it to my daughters and see what they think of it. They probably won't be impressed though. haha!! Seriously if you knew my girls you would laugh out loud at that because my oldest would probably not have any reaction at all. But I would. Maybe that's what I should focus on. Should that be my "goal dress"? The outfit I have to wear? For grocery shopping for Christmas dinner?  ;)

Goals, Rewards, and More Reflections

I've decided that I want to reward myself with two goal milestones. I have had my final goal weight reward picked out for quite sometime now. I am going to get my second tattoo when I reach 180 pounds. 


Yesterday I found an old photo from a magazine with a super cute haircut. When I reach 190 pounds I am going to get my hair cut. I'm really excited about it because I'm not happy with how my hair looks right now. It's not a huge change, but I'm thinking that when I have lost 25 pounds that my face will be slimmer and a slight hairstyle change will really look great. 


I walked on the treadmill again today and I felt great! I kept thinking about 40 inches. I'm doing this, I will make it happen this time. I'm feeling good about my food choices too - but I need to get more fruits and veggies (especially salads) during our next shopping trip. 


Tonight I posted my beginning photos in my Progress Photos section. The side profile is quite scary. The clothes hides more stuff, but I seriously look hugely pregnant in that picture. :(  I'm not frowning because I am sad I'm not pregnant (I don't want to go there again... at all!), but I'm frowning because I'm sad I look pregnant and the kid is almost two. Toddler weight isn't so cute as baby weight is.... Oh well.... No more looking back, only forward.